Burned

From Wikipedia:

Faith is the confident belief or trust in the truth or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.[1][2] For example, the word "faith" can refer to a religion itself or to religion in general. As with "trust", faith involves a concept of future events or outcomes, and is used conversely for a belief "not resting on logical proof or material evidence."[3][4] Informal usage of the word "faith" can be quite broad, and may be used in place of "trust" or "belief."

A couple of weeks ago my 3 year old daughter had inflammation "down there." When she was 5-6 months old she had a UTI that got up into her kidneys and gave her a fairly high fever. Antibiotics kicked it out, and she had no more. So I was understandably worried. I called her doctor and they said to "pack it with cornstarch" because it was most likely diaper rash. So I listened.

And things got worse. And then she was crying when she peed and telling me that it hurt while bending at the waist and turning red. So we ended up in an Urgent Care on Saturday morning. I'll let the email I sent to the CEO, the Director of Medical Operations, and the Director of Medical Operations- North Carolina, speak for itself.

Dear Sirs-

My three year old daughter, Olivia XXXX, had been presenting with
symptoms of either vaginitis or a UTI for over a week. Her primary
care physician instructed me over the phone to treat her for diaper
rash when the symptoms first developed. Nothing improved, and by
yesterday, 7/25/2009, she was complaining that urinating was painful
and was crying when it occurred. She is not potty trained yet, as
we're currently in the process.

We arrived at the XXXXX location at 1:04pm. I went through
the process of registering her as a new patient. We waited to be
seen, and a nurse collected us at 2:02pm. She led us to an
examination room and got my daughter's temperature, and then asked me
to describe her symptoms. I informed her that my daughter's inner
labia had been red and irritated for over a week, let her know about
the doctor's diaper rash instructions, and then informed her that
over the course of the week her symptoms had been getting more severe
to the point of painful urination. I informed her that at about 5 or
6 months of age my daughter had developed a kidney infection with a
fairly high fever and I was worried that this would progress. She
jotted things down and then told me the doctor would be in shortly.

In about an hour Dr H walked in and asked me a few questions.
He then informed me that since my daughter isn't potty trained and
can't leave a sample in a cup there was no way for them to treat her.
He informed me that I could go to Quest or LabCorp and get a bag from
them, take it home, collect a sample, and then return the bag to the
lab. I asked him when the lab was open, and he informed me that they
were open until 3pm. Then he realized that it was after 3pm, so he
left to get their information for me. He spoke with us for less than
3 minutes, and he never performed a physical exam.

He returned a few minutes later with a slip of paper with
instructions for the lab. Then he left again. He was with us for less
than a minute.

Another nurse arrived a few moments later with a slip of paper
containing the phone numbers for both labs so I could find a location
and get their hours.

We were then directed to leave. It was 3:23pm.

Today I took my daughter to a children's urgent care facility here in
Raleigh, and upon collecting a sample from her they discovered that
her urine is full of leukocytes and contains blood. They're having
the sample cultured.

At issue is the fact that Dr. H neglected to even perform a
physical exam. Another issue is that if we had been alerted earlier
in our visit that the office couldn't make accommodations to collect
a sample from a toddler we could have gone to a lab prior to their
closing time. The concern is that if she does in fact have a bladder
infection the longer she goes without antibiotics the more likely it
is to get into her kidneys again.

I will be contacting my insurance carrier to alert them of this
situation. If they decline to cover Dr. H's charges and the
bill is submitted to us, we will be declining to pay it as well.

I received an email Sunday night from the NC Director saying he would address the matter promptly, but have received nothing since.

Last week I was on the phone with the nurse in my mother's school discussing an entirely different matter involving Jonas when she inquired about his diet. I told her since he appeared to be lactose intolerant he was on "sensitive" lactose-free formula. She told me it was impossible for babies to be lactose intolerant and that he must have a milk protein allergy. She told me to switch him to soy. I told her that anytime we had given him soy he had vomited giant amounts. She made a noise. When I told her he was also getting rice cereal in his bottles to help with his reflux she said, "Did your pediatrician tell you to do that? It can lead to obesity." I told her that the doctor had indeed suggested we thicken his feedings and that it seemed to help. I heard another noise.

So today I tried to give him some soy. I honestly should have backed off when he pushed the bottle out of his mouth. But I offered it again. Over the course of an hour he took 3 oz. And then he fell asleep and I put him in his swing. An hour later he projectile vomited all over himself. So I thought, fine. I was right. I got him out of the swing and laid him down to get him out of his pajamas. He barfed again while on his back. He choked on it and turned purple. No air was getting in or out, and I threw him over my arm and beat him on the back until he started coughing and tossed up the rest of the fluid.

And then I sat on the sofa and cried. Because I knew better, but I didn't trust my gut, for the second time in as many weeks, and I almost killed my son.

Faith? I have to learn to have it in myself.