Friday, October 23, 2009

Stream of Consciousness

Someone posted something like this today, so I'm going to do one of my own. My food post will come tonight.

I do not like a lot of things. I'd say more than is entirely necessary. We'll start with Do Not and end with Do so as to send you all off on a happy note.

I do not like the current culture of "____-nazis" At. All. I do not appreciate breast feeding nazis, or attachment parenting nazis, or food nazis, or book nazis, or film nazis, etc. See "Self Important Busy Bodies of the New Millenium." The great thing about opinions is that everyone is entitled to their own. Quit telling me mine is wrong. Stumbled across a message board a few months back where nearly every chick wanted formula to be prescription only to force women to breast feed. Let me tell YOU what to do with your body and see how you like it. I do not like being incorrect about something when I was certain I was correct. Over the years, though, I have learned to eat my crow sammich like a good girl and move on. I do not like having severe pain. I do not like creatures with more than 6 legs. I especially hate those with over 100. I do not like not being able to afford even the smaller things I would like, but I've learned to accept it and deal. Since I grew up that way from the get-go, I think it's easier. I think having to be the Bad Guy 80% of the time in this household sucks. I'm not very fond of disrespect. In anyone, to anyone. I absolutely hate liars, cheaters, and thieves. And if a person ever accuses me of any of those 3 they will feel a wrath unlike any they have ever known. I'm not a fan of most sitcoms. There have been a few over the decades that were stellar. I really can't stand pretentious "films." They remind me of The Emperor's New Clothes. On the other hand, I don't like most romantic comedies because I think they set too many gullible chicks up for disappointment. Plus they make me gag. I hate feeling the need to defend my love of old musicals and Disney flicks. So I no longer bother. I think the media's panic mongering sucks. I dislike when people don't have the balls to come right out and tell me how they feel about something they don't like about me. I really can't stand people who are "celebrities" for absolutely no reason whatsoever. I despise the vehicles that race past our house as loudly as they can. If you need to make that much noise to prove that you have a dick, you probably don't. I hate people who hurt kids or old people. I hate people who hurt animals. Doing any of those three simply proves that you are a giant pussy. I do not like humidity. There really is no escape from it on the east coast. Mosquitos, fleas, and ticks make me want to nuke the world sometimes. I think clowns are the epitome of evil. I suspect Hitler used to dress as a clown before he shtupped Eva. I really don't like things that are askew. Really. Don't. Like. I hate that a lot of folks who have met me originally liked me because I'm crazy, but then when they learned that's not going to change they retreated. Along those lines, I don't like when people expect me to be "on" all the time. My name isn't Robin Williams, and I don't have a coke habit. I don't like people who spend more time on their hair than they do on their responsibilities. I do NOT like people who make extended cell calls out in public. Loudly. I HATE bluetooth technology. People look like they're talking to the Great 'Possum who asked them to kill their neighbors. I don't like the fact that I never really got a "higher education." But I still loathe that woman whose coffee table I carried to her car who told me that "they" hadn't marched and protested for me to do manual labor. I told her I thought they had done those things so I could do and be whatever I wanted. I am mortified by some of the mistakes I've made in my life, even though learning from them made me who I am today. I don't like California. I really don't know exactly why. I think the designated hitter is a ridiculous idea. I don't like generalizations of any sort and try very hard not to make them myself. Sometimes I fail. I hate failing. I think people who believe there's only one way to be intelligent are sadly mistaken. I hate stainless steel appliances. Too OCD to deal with the smudges. I hate James Patterson's 2 page chapters. I really, really don't like people who equate "country" with "stupid." Or "southern" with "racist." See generalizing. I despise Greedo shooting first. I loathe "SyFy." I don't like watching Rich do risky or dangerous things. So I usually don't watch. I really hate that I stopped wearing earrings when Livvie was born so she wouldn't rip my lobes open, and the holes closed up. I think it's annoying as ass when Rich steals the covers. I simply can't stand spilling food on myself. I hate that so many I've loved in my life have died.

I love the fact that I was directed to Harry Potter before the hoopla that would have discouraged me from reading them. I like finding tiny strawberries in the lawn. I think that the simple, circular, rubber disk jar opener is one of the most brilliant inventions ever. I love food. I love drink. I love smoking (sadly). I think the smell of a fireplace is awesome. Especially when it's far enough away that you only get an occasional surprise whiff. As far as smells go, I think the greatest one on the planet is that of tomato plants on your hands after pinching off the suckers. I love that the growing season in NC is so long. I think it's awesome that I can grow every plant but basil. Why not basil? I don't know. I love reconnecting with old friends and making new, good ones. I love my crockpot. I think it's great when things don't turn out as expected, but in retrospect are better than expected. I like the fact that I can cry over movies and books without feeling shame. I really like the marks left behind in a freshly vacuumed carpet. I find great happiness in beating the shit out of other characters in fighting video games. I adore the afghans my mother has knitted for us regardless of the fact that they're acrylic. I'm ecstatic that I quit biting my nails when I was 22. I love it when life gives you proof of the absurdity of it all. I love card games, but pinochle gives me a headache. I think it's great that I once installed a new phone jack in my old apartment and that I can change the battery in a car all by myself. I think the sharp, metallic smell of snow is fabulous. Especially on mittens for some reason. I think the Tom Collins is the perfect drink on a hot summer's day, followed immediately by the gin and tonic. I love Shark Week beyond belief. My heart gets all happy when someone sends me a card for no reason, and I need to send more cards of my own. Bacon. I love opening the dishwasher and sticking my face into the steam on cold days. I really like the fact that Jack Bauer does all the things I'd like to do to some people and Gregory House says all the things I'd like to say to some people, leaving me somewhat karmically safe. I really dig books that hook you so hard you suck them down in hours, sometimes reading all night. I love me some movies where shit blows up or giant animals eat people and those that have incredibly non-PC humor. I think the internet is fabulous because I've "met" so many different people who do so many different things. Plus without it, I'd have never met Rich. I love having intellectual disagreements with people when the disagreements don't become emotional. I love learning. I really like it when people make me think. I am exceptionally happy that my father taught me enough about boating that I could take a boat out crabbing in my 20s and still find my way back to the marina. I loved the smell of my Uncle Eddie's cigars but his sarcasm was even better. Dry humor rocks. I appreciate wit, but I'll still laugh at a fart joke. I think the critters found in tidal pools are amazing. The teeny clams that dig back into the sand after a wave breaks make me squeal with glee. So do Horseshoe Crabs. I really liked it when living with my mom I was receiving mail from The Institute for Human Origins and she was getting mail from The Society for Creation Research. On the same days. I think it's awesome when people in any service industry take the time to remember you and what you like. I'm really happy when Rich brings me flowers from the yard instead of spending obscene money on a florist. I was utterly thrilled when my brand new wedding ring started getting scratched and dinged. I love catching episodes of much loved TV shows in the middle of the night. I love listening to my mom's stories of the Depression and the War, and I hope I remember enough of them to pass them along. Her story of being sprayed by a skunk is legend. I love romance, and I love reality, and I'm absolutely thrilled when those things intersect. I love being in my 30s, and I wouldn't go back to the 20s for a million dollars. I love that I can't wait to see what's next.


Rillibee's Mom said...

And I love YOU, my Internet little Internet Surprise Sugarmom.

squirrelgirl said...

Great post!

Chuck said...

This is just too awesome for words.

Julie said...

Thanks, folks. I'd really like to see your lists too.

Cyn said...

I love reading this.